Pruning Dead Buds

Have you looked at your Facebook friend count lately? I have. It's ridiculous. Try as I might, I can't recall meeting 90 percent of the 426 people who claim me as their cyber pal.

Don't get me wrong—Facebook has been a boon to many of the 0.6 billion people who live on it, myself included. It's replaced email between me and about six people whose company I enjoy, and it's my sole conduit to a dozen old connections I'd given up on decades ago. How many friends you knew 25 years ago are still in your life? For me the answer is seven, 10 max. They know who they are, and they know I enjoyed our time together. Is it necessary to swap photos of children, pets and motorcycle projects to ignite new memories? It isn't, but Facebook makes it so easy, I ruefully play the game.

Two people I've known since the early 1980's have recently pruned their friend list or turned off Facebook completely. One did so to spend more time with his family, the other to add some extra minutes to his Daily grind. I'd like to follow both gentlemen, but doing so might push me completely off the precipice of hermitdom I've been teetering on for years. Everyone in my life—even those who exist in html—is special, but that doesn't exempt them from pruning. My own OCD is much stronger than any cyber ties that bind.

To that end, I will now gingerly attempt to separate the wheat from the chaff, electronically speaking. If you find the FB connection between us has been severed, please don't take it personally. I pondered every click of the light grey "X" carefully, and tried valiantly to be consistent and fair.

My criteria for cutting was calculated, but no doubt several BFF's from BITD will become flotsam and jetsam during my Facebook waylay.

Thanks for the memories, and please accept my apology. If we meet again (or for the first time) in 3D, I will be happy to turn off my smart phone and catch up over a drink.

Gin and tonic with a twist, just like an old 3D friend I met in 1987 taught me to enjoy.


Flatironmike said...

regular Bombay, i trust. i'll drink to that.

Green Laker said...

Whew - looks like I made the cut (so far). I, too, have gone through some culling phases and will have to again soon as my count is hovering around 350.

Allen said...

Fuck, I wasn't even on the list to begin with. What's lower than pond scum?