OMG

Members of every self-respecting motorcycle "club" (only cops call them "gangs") take the rules and regulations of their organizations seriously. The MC cognescenti are quick to remind uninitiated citizens like me that nobody starts a motorcycle club in their city or state without first determining if a rival organization has already laid claim to that region. Strict guidelines on the design and presentation of every motorcycle club's embroidered insignia or "colors" must also be recognized and enforced. The message of motorcycle club etiquette is clear: if you want to be a rebel, you better learn to follow the rules.

I didn't know any of this when I sat down to create the colors for my new organization:

I chose my new club's name because "The Brotherhood of The Lone Wolf" was already taken. Although the Fisters don't yet have a San Francisco chapter, the alliteration is too good to pass up. In the biker's domain rules for use of the abbreviation "MC" are sacrosanct, but because they're also the first two letters of my last name, I don't think the president of Satan's Devils MC will mind.

The 1% designation on so-called "Outlaw Motorcycle Gang" riding gear is an homage to the forefathers of the "deviant biker" movement that first wreaked havoc in Hollister in 1947. Because I practice deviant behavior at least 10% of the time, I chose this even greater fraction to represent the Fisters' attitude and ideology. Further enlightenment on the 1% moniker may be gleaned by watching this video:

Testify, brother

Groucho Marx was never an outlaw biker, but the social commentator's philosophy on clubs as a whole boasts depth and weight:

"I don't want to belong to any club that would have me as one of its members"

When you get right down to it, neither do I.

OMG